Ok, so I am throwing myself a bit of a pity party and need to vent. Now I must say that this is more of a venting than a complaining post. So PLEASE don't flood with me with comments about how someone has it worse than I do. I know that, but I am hoping that in posting it I can get it off my chest and maybe, just maybe, others feel the same as I do.
I am happy for my friends, I truly am. However, it seems that the vast majority are: in a relationship, newlyweds, engaged and having babies and I can't even get a date or have a (respectable) guy interested in me. I am feeling a bit left behind. I have always thought it was because I am a bit on the chunky side, but hey, big girls need lovin too ya know?? I discovered today that I am the only single person that works at Arby's (the store I work in). Single as in, no boyfriend or girlfriend. And I don't want to hear that someday it will happen. The people who say that are in relationships. I also do not believe that there is someone for everyone. There are times when being completely single is ok with me and there are times when it is not. This is one of those times. It has been very lonely here in Lynchburg. I have met some great people at Arby's and school but it is NOT the same as having my friends up north. My friends are my family, they love me no matter what and know all about me. As I have gotten older it has become harder for me to open up to new people. I did get to see my all my family at Christmas and had a hard time leaving. I miss them lots!!! Ok I was going to keep going, but I think I will stop.
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3 comments:
Jen, moving to a new place is a big change, even if it is only two hours away. I think I faced similar issues when I moved here from Spain. Have you found a good church there? Capital helped me a lot when I moved here. You already trust God and you know your life is in His hands. I know you've read Captivating, so I will repeat to you: you are LOVELY, you are CAPTIVATING and you are LOVED. I will pray for you, sweetie.
It's all a matter of perspective chica...when you get to a point and you're no longer lonely when you're alone...that's the ultimate FREEDOM. Nothing's holding you back...so start slapping life in the face sweets. ;-) I recommend listening to ALOT of Miranda Lambert..especially 'Kerosene' & "Gun Powder & Lead"...the Single Life is a awesome gift, but only if you take advantage of it. :-)
I am definitely NO stranger to moving and know the change that is involved. I moved around my whole life. I guess I was expecting something different. It didn't work out the way I thought it would. That is the wrong thinking, I know. It is frustrating when things don't go as planned. I haven't found a church yet. Between work and school I haven't had a chance to church shop. I have my moments when it is ok to be single and not ok. It fluctuates. I think it has to do with this time of year and seeing couple after couple after couple you know get engaged and get married and people having babies. Especially when it is something you long for. Not to mention....i am about to turn 31 and looking at how my life has turned out. I just need to focus on HIM more. More of HIM and less of me! Thanks for the encouragement :)
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